Jesus’ heavy laden heart struggles with his dehydrated broken body to pump thick, heavy, sluggish blood to a resistant, barely living being.
“I thirst,” he whispers.
One last request. It is time to will himself to die.
Can they refuse? No! Look! Someone has had mercy on you, Son of God! He’s taking a sponge dipped in vinegar, and now…and now…he is offering it to you, thirsty Savior. A drink.
With the weariness of dying, Jesus takes the vinegar and it momentarily helps the nausea.
His tormented swollen heart labors slower and slower. Gradually and increasingly surrounded by a contemptible, mocking serum, his heart strains even harder as it struggles to pump just a few more drops of blood. Slower it pumps, and slower…
….Everything is getting so dim, so hazy, so blurry…. Where is everything going? Around and around. Spinning, spinning, back, farther and farther, faster, faster, faster!
He groans. “It…is…finished…”
…Finished. Your work all completed. Everything as you knew it would be. And now, oh Lamb of God, die! The sacrifice is completed. But for your sins, Son of God? No, of course not. You have none. You’ve been perfect, unselfish one, from your human birth, the whole way. All of this has been for the others.
…Everything is getting so far away….so far away….so far away. It’s so lonely….no one here….so hazy….all alone….forsaken….desolate…
…Something drawing….something….something drawing you to it. What is it? Where is it coming from? Look up! But the pain – the cramping relentless pain – so merciless. Torturing to the very end. But look up. Look up! Quick! Don’t you see?
He calls out. ” Father!” Yes, he’s coming for you! ” Father! I know you’re there. My spirit…it’s yours!”
…Just a little more now! Just a little closer….
His head lifts up in all the defiance of death. His body jerks and writhes, his knotted muscles strain. Just a little closer now…
His heart swells…trembles…and bursts. And with a loud piercing cry that shakes the foundations of the earth, Jesus sends his liberated spirit rushing at last to the outstretched arms of God.
“Oh my Son! My Son!”
[Excerpt from Shadow of Death, Book 7 of Soul Journey With Jesus]